Windows LiveWindows Live™
 
 
Fiona 的个人资料Wishful thinking...照片日志列表更多 工具 帮助

日志
    4月27日

    Keep Talking

    I think I should speak now  (why won't you talk to me?)
    I can't seem to speak now  (you never talk to me)
    My words won't come out right  (what are you thinking?)
    I feel like I'm drowning  (what are you feeling?)
    I'm feeling weak now  (why won't you talk to me?)
    But I can't show my weakness  (you never talk to me)
    I sometimes wonder  (what are you thinking?)
    Where do we go from here  (what are you feeling?)
     
    Tomorrow is non uniform day.  I am to non uniform day as Julius Caesar was to the Ides of March.  It better not happen two years in a row or I will swear this day is cursed.
     
    Please be alright.  I'm getting paranoid now.  (Thank you, J, admittedly not as paranoid as I might have been...)  I wasn't so worried until this afternoon when you looked right through me, at which point, suddenly...  I'm not very good at this, sorry.  It's lack of communication...
     
    Have shitloads to do tonight.  So talk to me.  I need distraction.
    17:35 | 添加评论 | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月25日

    No man is an island.

    You would do well to remember that.
     
    Something's wrong.  You know what I mean.  I know you know I saw it.  Don't try and lie to me, I've had too much experience of people doing that to be unable to tell.  Besides, do you really want to?  Really?
     
    I refer to entry 21st January.
     
    That's what happens when one isn't honest.  So just you be careful.  Okay?
     
     
    The warmth makes everything worthwhile.
     
    Shh...
     
     
    So you've given me your explanation.  The question now is: is that a euphemism?  There's something you're not telling me...
    18:01 | 添加评论 | 阅读评论 (1) | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月20日

    Because I'm in a dutiful mood

    The Guide Promise is:

    I promise that I will do my best, to love my God, to serve the Queen and my country, to help other people and to keep the Guide Law.

    The Guide Laws are:

    A Guide is honest, reliable and can be trusted.
    A Guide is helpful and uses her time and abilities wisely.
    A Guide faces challenges and learns from her experiences.
    A Guide is a good friend and a sister to all Guides.
    A Guide is polite and considerate.
    A Guide respects all living things and takes care of the world around her.

    The Guide Motto is:

    Be prepared.

    The Unmentioned Laws are:

    A Guide is tidy and wears the correct uniform at all times.
    A Guide knows the first two verses of her National Anthem off by heart, and can instinctively carry big fuck-off flags properly, so that they are steady, and so that the Scouts don't laugh.
    A Guide beats the Scouts hands-down in all competitions, and sucks up to all Scout leaders.
    A Guide is pacifist, but can set traps and use water/stink/mud bombs to a high standard.
    A Guide is not scared of beetles, woodlice or other bugs found in British woodland.
    A Guide does as she is told and agrees instantly with all District Commissioners etc and is a credit to her pack.  (Get out, Wellow, Copythorne etc, 1st Lockerley beats all)
    A Guide can start a fire from embers in the rain, and then cook three-course gourmet meals on it.
    A Guide can read a map and compass to a higher standard than the Scouts so that the latter pale into insignificance.

    Things a Guide must always carry with her:

    A piece of string
    A twenty pence piece
    A harmonica
    Her necker (sky blue and lilac, get in!)
    All-purpose gadget wood
    A small, sharp, obviously completely safe, penknife
    A working compass
    A small torch
    Shoe polish.

    22:20 | 添加评论 | 阅读评论 (2) | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月17日

    Que sera sera

    Never mind.  It's not like I care anyway.
     
    I'm having such a good week lol twice.  TWICE.  Ah well.
     
    I quote AVFTB: "You want somethin' else, Eddie, and you can never have her!"  Never mind.  I shall rest safe in the knowledge that I Know and that is all I need.
     
    IF - RUDYARD KIPLING
    ==============
     
    If you can keep your head when all about you
    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
    If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
    But make allowance for their doubting too,
    If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
    Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
    Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
    And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

    If you can dream--and not make dreams your master,
    If you can think--and not make thoughts your aim;
    If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
    And treat those two impostors just the same;
    If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
    Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
    And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

    If you can make one heap of all your winnings
    And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
    And lose, and start again at your beginnings
    And never breath a word about your loss;
    If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
    To serve your turn long after they are gone,
    And so hold on when there is nothing in you
    Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

    If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
    Or walk with kings--nor lose the common touch,
    If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
    If all men count with you, but none too much,
    If you can fill the unforgiving minute
    With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
    Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
    And--which is more--you'll be a Man, my son!

     

    Not entirely sure about the Man bit, but this poem has kept me sane several times in the last few weeks.

    20:46 | 添加评论 | 阅读评论 (1) | 固定链接 | 写入日志

    Hmm...

    Sensitivity- Your inner power is Sensitivity! You are true to your heart, and probably a hopeless romantic. Everyone loves you for your gentle ways and kind words, and you are brilliant with animals and young children. Youre very sweet and caring, and you have friends who love you, who are always there to support you and hold you when your fragile heart is broken. You are most likely often found daydreaming about your life and your future, and you have a talent for dealing with kids, all of which adore you, even if youve only been around them for five minutes. Youre the one your friends turn to when they need a shoulder to cry on, and a kind word to get them smiling again. You are shy, lovable, compassionate, and seek to make the world a better place. You will go far in life for sure. You go girl!
    Boy/Girl who will sweep you off your feet: The romantic, sweet guy/girl that every girl dreams of at some stage in their life. You just love the way he/she treats you as you are the most precious, important girl in the world, and the way you know hell/shell never cheat on you.
    Your stone/jewel: Calcite
    Your power: Love. You can make the most revengeful person mellow, and have a talent for being a brilliant match maker.
    Your element: Earth
    A quote that applies to you: "When you step to the ledge of all the light you have left, and you take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you might believe one of two things will happen. There will be something solid for you step upon, or you will learn how to fly."
    16:04 | 添加评论 | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月14日

    Mixed blessings

    I didn't realise what it was.  For years I didn't realise what it was.  And it got worse last year, I know it did.
     
    That was your fault, wasn't it?  You told them.  They all knew.
     
    I am angry.  So so angry.  YOU DESERVED IT, YOU BITCH, YOU DESERVED IT.  DON'T YOU EVER - EVER - DARE READ MY DIARY AGAIN.  DON'T YOU DARE.  OR IF I FIND OUT I WILL RIP YOU... LIMB... FROM... LIMB.
     
    Those are MY PRIVATE THOUGHTS.  I don't let you see for a reason.  Because you'll be offended.  You won't understand what I mean and you'll read it the wrong way.  I didn't mean that as an insult.
     
    AND IF YOU HADN'T LOOKED YOU WOULDN'T BE FUCKING INSULTED WOULD YOU??
     
    But also - I feel empty.  I feel as if something that was a vital part of me has been ripped out.  Do you remember when we were eight, and we took my washbag because it was the only bag we had, and went out on the green picking blackberries?  Do you remember hiding from Dan in the woods in the back of my garden?  Making clay pots in the playhouse?  Playing The Lion The Witch And The Wardrobe behind your sofa?  We were so close.  So close.
     
    And I've dreaded Thursdays, Saturdays, for the last few years because of you.  Because I've had to endure nobody talking to me, you all looking at me as if I was scum... for years.  You taking the piss out of me behind my back.
     
    BE FRI ST END, wasn't it?
     
    No fucking chance.
     
    I hope you read this.  I hope you never forget it.
    22:25 | 添加评论 | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月9日

    BAAAARGES

    I'm off tomorrow on a barge in Northamptonshire (ish) with the Guides.
     
    It's going to be amazing.  Third longest tunnel in the UK, mile and a quarter, what a legend.
     
    Going to miss you lot, though.  Text me or summat.  Okay?
     
    Okay.
     
     
    Missing you already.  Very much.  I wish this wasn't happening now...  I'm feeling over the moon again.  You always have that effect on me.  Come to think of it you have several effects on me.  DO text me, I don't think I'll manage lasting five days...
     
     
    A baby sardine saw her first submarine
    She was scared and watched through a peephole.
    "Oh, come, come, come," said the sardine's Mum,
    "It's only a tin full of people."
     
    Spike Milligan.  What a genius.
    22:39 | 添加评论 | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月7日

    Et voila

    ...as they say in Cambodia.  Probably.
     
    As promised...
     
    THGBUU HBGJYV RIQVLT ZBBFRH TAGVGU AVBUXG GHNBPO NEBTGA VGHNBY LSAVBF EOHRBI GVXAVR RQJAEB JBRUYQ GVBTQA GRGXUN BLNXHA RLSEFB NQGELR RUOGJL JGNVNL QAFBRJ JYEHRS QGZFBH NTVNVG RZABGF KKVRKZ
    This consists of a 6-letter transposition and a ROT-13.  Translate the ROT-13 first or you won't get the Shakespeare connotation.
     
    It is my belief that two people will try to translate this.
     
    One is intended to.
     
    The other will because he Can and so he can comment on it.  He won't understand the second half anyway, but it's a nice thing to try, isn't it?
     
    I've added another photo gallery.  Or, I will have in a sec.
     
    Have a look.  Slightly self-centred as galleries go but... I have to have somewhere to put them.
    18:21 | 添加评论 | 阅读评论 (1) | 固定链接 | 写入日志
    4月3日

    The most brilliant few days

    Ok still banned from computer but... hopefully Lily WILL actually cover for me this time when she says she will so I won't get my allowance blocked this time... pssh.
     
    Other than that, I have had some of the most wonderful few days in this country in living memory.
     
    Saturday, needless to say, was fantastic.  Absolutely fantastic.  The weather was beautiful and so was everything else.  I have a picture... and I've stuck it in my diary... and I keep looking at it when I write (which has been a lot more than usual recently for some reason) and smiling so much I think I'll burst.  It's strange how sometimes that happens...
     
    And the the Boosh.  Well.  Enough said.
     
    You said you'd ring me, J.  I don't hear the phone...?
     
    ARGH if only Lily could find some friend to gatecrash on Wednesday.  She's being a little bitch at the moment anyway.  And now I have no choice but to swap the best company imaginable for THAT little scrawner...
     
    Thursday.  Roll on Thursday.
    20:57 | 添加评论 | 固定链接 | 写入日志